Monday, November 9, 2009

Wow....a Triple-Header Review??

We know you idolize our opinions, so we do this for you.

We promise, we are going to start doing more of these, since we have gotten rave reviews for our reviews. A few things up front as reminders, we don't actually review games the way you're used to. We don't have to put hours and hours into a game and complete it, then give you all types of technical jargon bull to come up with a decimal point rating. We basically review games the way you do: we play for a bit and come to a decision whether or not this game is good and warrants more play time. So, without further ado, I bring you the latest installment of the BarcodePodcast review section! (Oh, quick note, these are all Craig's opinions, so mock him if you don't agree!)

GAME #1
You all know how we nutted all over Batman: Arkham Asylum because of its amazing story and bad-ass combat. You also know, if you've been listening, that I am the comic book fan, and that Mike is too cool for all that "young at heart" crap. So of course I had to get my hands on "Champions Online" as soon as I could. As an MMO, I felt this game deserved a bit more time before I wrote this review, so I killed some time before getting this posted....off we go.

First off, I must admit that I have played a few MMOs in the past. As mentioned in previous podcasts, I played Warcraft for about 9 months or so. While I appreciated its technical achievements, I grew very bored of the repetitive storyline and quest structure and bailed. Next was Guild Wars, the free-to-play MMO. Again, I liked its look, but grew quickly tired and bailed once I realized I was playing more out of obligation than fun. At this time I realized the scam these companies use: they make you play more because you feel you already paid and put in all this time, and not because you can't wait to see what stupid Rat Creature you have to kill to get five of it's hides and bring them to some guy who lives on the other side of the PLANET so we can send you to the other guy who makes the hides into potions that will help you get the young lady in your original town to give you another QUEST. Really? Seriously?? That's not even a joke, people....that happened. Twice.

Last but not least was City of Heroes/Villains. This game kept my attention the longest, as it catered to my love of superheroes and allowed for a lot of solo play (guilds are for queers). Plus the character creation was amazing. But again, I bailed after a while, as too many other games were taking up my time.

Then the CoH/V creators made Champions Online. Put simply, this game is an improvement in every conceivable way, and one that you will enjoy for a while. Why, you ask? Well, first off, I challenge you to try the insane character creation and not have a blast. You can even change the powers down to the color of an energy blast and where it fires from. Seriously, it is much more fun to do than to explain. The game provides so many options you can even make a character that could get you a hit with a lawsuit for infringement. Plus the game encourages solo play just as much as group play, so you can play however you like. And the comic book-style look to it is amazing looking, and will draw you in even further.

Remember, you may only play for six months or even a year, but that is still much longer than I ever give to single game. So in my (comic) book, this game is a (power) blast! Awwww yeah, you like how I did that, right? Am I awesome or what??



GAME #2
I don't even want to waste your time with a long-winded review of this next game. This should pretty much suffice: If you have a PS3, go buy Uncharted 2 right now. Seriously. Unless maybe you are already playing it, but then you should buy another one to support Naughty Dog. This game is amazing, in every possible way. It is quite possibly the most cinematic game I have ever played. And yes, I am including MGS4 in that statement. While MGS4 had a very intricate story with a lot of excellent cut scenes, Uncharted 2 could literally be turned into a movie tomorrow, frame for frame. You will love the 'building collapsing' scene just as much as you loved watching at E3, but that's only the start. The train scene? The escape from the tower? Wow...I could go on all day, but I don't want to ruin it. Seriously, get it right now. I'll wait. And damn, are you dumb for waiting for my review to finally pick it up. How cheap are you?


GAME #3
Here is the final game. Now I know it is well documented on our show that Mike and I have completely different tastes in music. While he enjoys screaming and shouting, I enjoy a more refined type of music with nice beats and words you can almost understand. Something more like, say, Jay-Z or the Jackson 5. So you would assume that DJ Hero would be right up my alley. And if you assumed that, you would be right.

Finally a game was made for those of us who aren't solely into Rock Music. The whole mash-up concept works very well, mixing Pop music with R&B, or Rap with Rock, etc. The music selection, while not perfect, is definitely better than the last few Guitar Hero games. And the turntable feels as awesome as Guitar Hero did the first time you ever played it. It definitely gets you even closer to the authentic feel than any other plastic instrument has to this point. Check it out, maybe at a GameStop or a friends, and see what you think. But if you like music games, or Hip-Hop, or both, buy this game today. But not the Renegade Edition. They are seriously trying to screw you there. 80 bucks for a few new songs and a DJ table? Only a retard would do that. Please tell me you're not retarded? Are we still allowed to use the word 'retarded'? Wow, that word is funny. Just say it with me....RETARD. HA!

FINAL REVIEW SCORES

Champions Online: 18 (An incredibly awesome generic MMO, which knocks it down because MMOs are by definition so far impossibly generic and filled with fetch-quests...but a great one for what it does, which is make you feel like a Super-Hero comic book writer.)

Uncharted 2: 26 (An awesome all-around game for anyone with a PS3....no snappy banter, or witty review words...just go buy it.)

DJ Hero: 21 (A great music game that doesn't do anything new with the gameplay or modes versus any of the older music games, but finally includes good music...good enough for me.)



Agree with these Reviews? Disagree vehemently? We want to know. Drop us a line at BarcodePodcast@gmail.com!

CONGRATULATIONS, our dear friends.

Congrats...You All Deserve It.
We, the Barcode Boys of the famed BarcodePodcast, are delighted to officially send out this congratulatory post to ye of eternal glory, the one, the only, NEW YORK YANKEES.
As firm and staunch supporters of the "Yanks", we are honored to welcome you into our families as World Champions! While the Phillies put up a nice little struggle, we were always confident that you would be victorious, and you have proved us right once again. This is a short but sweet "Thank You" for making our lives more enjoyable, and this world a better place to live. Thank you again, and may you all have a prosperous off-season in preparation for another Back-to-Back World Series Victory (being the last team to do it, of course)! We both could not be happier for your success, and wish you all the best! Keep it up.
-Love,
Your Two Biggest Fans in Podcast History,
The Barcode Boys, Craig & Mike

Episode 33 will crawl its way through your eyeballs and into your brain.

Boo.

Did we scare you? Yeah, I know, you are too scared to respond. That's because you are about to listen to the "Halloween Edition", BarcodePodcast-style!

In this episode the Boys explore the holiday we all loved as kids by celebrating via Beer! Pumpkin beer, that is. And boy does it get them wrecked. So wrecked that they actually switch up some of their bits!! MIKE'S Bad Movie Review?? WHAAAAT? How scared are you? Wait, did you say CRAIG takes the lead on a List-Mania List of "Piss Your Pants"-Inducing Games?? Stop it, I can't take any more!! Oh, and the Boys dig deep into the Listener Live vault for real, live voicemails from horrific-sounding fans! It just keeps getting worse! Who needs "Paranormal Activity" when you have...

The BarcodePodcast....Boo.

Did I mention they got hammered? Wow, did they ever.

-Check all this out and more at
www.BarcodePodcast.com!